Friday, May 7, 2010

the blister on my foot is taking over my attitude.

I told my Dad that I inform him of where I am going and where I hope to go out of respect and because I know he likes to hear it from me, rather than hearing it through my mom or brother. I also said that this time here is the only time this summer I'm going to get to enjoy myself. Starting in June, I will be training for STAMP (which is now going to be called START) and camp. Then in July, see ya later social life, love life, family life, and blog life because I'll be working 40-50 hours a week (on average). Of course, there will be longer weeks when I have to work at START on the weekends. 

He didn't have anything to say other than, "put your shoes that you don't wear in the basement." I already did that last week.

I went to go see "How To Train Your Dragon" tonight with Nick. It was really cute! I'm a sucker for cheesy kids' movies. Nick paid for my ticket, even though he didn't have to. I'd rather him save his money than spend it on me. I'm cool if I pay for my own ticket. I don't know, I've never been one to demand to be showered with free movies and gifts. I feel weird when people pay for me or give me things unexpectedly. It makes me feel empty handed. I guess it's the way I've been brought up.

I guess my night turned around for the better. I feel bad, though, because I talked to my mom about what happened with my Dad and she got really upset. I know this takes a toll on her because every time she starts working a lot, my Dad acts like this whenever my mom's not home. 

Sometimes I wish I didn't have to comment on every little thing so that I could spare my mom the pain of seeing my Dad, my brother, and I not getting along. 

Maybe if I was working this month I would've been able to escape all of this. That's the reason I didn't shed any tears, last summer. I was too busy to have a social life thus too busy for my Dad to notice that I wished I could go out more. Truth is, I worked almost every night from 4:30pm until 12:30am. It sucked.  I often felt really alone and I got sick easily when camp and STAMP started because I overworked myself. My Dad even said he was worried about me. Of course, he's not worried about me now when I'm actually enjoying myself, he's just there to criticize me.

Maybe I'm wrong and perhaps my Dad just had a bad day at work. I'll give him the benefit of the doubt until tomorrow. That is the real test.

Anyways, I ate pizza for dinner and I feel like a fat lard so I'm going to go do some crunches, leg raises, and a plank. I hope that makes me feel better. This entire night has put me in a slump that took away any excitement for tomorrow night's dancing and extreme photo taking with the girls I have known my entire life. 

That's my story.


NabilaHazirah said...

i hope things get better for you and your dad.

your going out with your friends tomorrow,don't let these things ruin your excitement,instead think about how much fun you're going to have to tomorrow! :)

have an awesome day tomorrow!


cris (cristal) said...

so sorry about u and ur dad.. hope things work out.