Saturday, March 13, 2010

before you read this, keep in mind that i love children.

I love children, but I just babysat the most annoying child I have ever met for five hours for free.

My parents had this renovation guy named Pete over today because we're planning on redoing our basement. I thought it'd be a great chance for me to snuggle up with my Freud text book and get ahead in readings. But, oh hell no that did not happen!

Pete brought over his 8-year-old son. He was sweet and kind of chubby. I liked him until we sat down to watch Godzilla on the Movie Network. Do you think this boy would let me watch the movie? No, he didn't stop talking.

"Oh, um, what do you think this movie is about? What do you think is going to happen? What do you think Godzilla is going to do? Is Godzilla a girl if she's pregnant? Why does everyone keep calling Godzilla a 'he'?"AHHHHH. These questions didn't stop.

Then, every one went to go do their own business. My mom and Pete went to my neighbour's house to check for some potential renos over there. My brother and my dad went to sleep and left me to babysit this little fella. Normally, I wouldn't have minded. I can deal with annoying children, because most of the time they are just being children and being curious. But this boy, I don't know.

He eventually took out his silly putty which kept him quiet for a bit. We played a game where I'd guess the animal he made with silly putty. Then, though, he started making tiny tiny silly putty balls and bouncing them throughout the house.

I looked at him and said, "You shouldn't bounce those. You're going to lose them and they are going to fall into the vents. You won't get them back."

He looked back at me and said, "What?" and continued bouncing the ball.

I've been babysitting since I was 15 years old. I have a younger brother. I have three cousins under the age of 7. I worked at a summer camp last year, too. I know kids like to make you give into their wants by annoying you, but this kid made me want to scream.

He kept bouncing those darn silly putty balls.

We started playing Connect Four after. He won the first game and just as I let the pieces out of the game set, his dad said it was time to go.

Thank. God.

I'm normally not this bitter, and I'm sorry that I'm being bitter. I just needed to vent the frustrations an 8-year-old boy put on me today.

Now I'm in no mood to get ahead in my readings.


Anonymous said...

don't you just hate silly putty balls!!
ahaha, lol this was quit amusing :)
I know the feeling though, theres just some kids, you can't put your finger on what, but they just drive you nuts!
good luck with your reading though :)

Barry said...

This reminds me why I never wanted kids. It's not that I dislike them, only when they act up. Which seemingly is a good part of the time.

I can't relate to babies. They're cooing, moist bundles of goo who can't communicate. Oh sure, if you're lucky you might catch a grunt and squinty eyes which indicates they just did something that requires a diaper change.

But most of the time all their expressions are the same, and they'll cry for everything. Leaving me asking "What?! Do you want food? Sleep? Wanna drive my car? WTF are you asking for??!"

It's a little known fact but it's absolutely true that I practically hyperventilate when my wife and I walk by the baby aisles in department stores.

As for Kidzilla, maybe you could have stretched the Silly Putty over his mouth and kept him quiet for a few hours.

*(And for anyone who may get bent out of shape reading this, NO I don't really mean it. Sheesh).